Sajal, privately message Ashir on his birthday. Itna toh hum kisi ke liye kar hi sakte hain. Aur agar usne reply nahi diya, toh that’s his choice. Har cheez ko ego par nahi lete aur apni self-respect sasti nahi karte. You understand? Take it as an experience and learn from it. Aindah bas itna yaad rakhna ke apni taraf se cordiality aur grace maintain karni hai, lekin overextend nahi karna.
He has always said nice things about you. Even Mahira ne agar aapke baare mein kuch kaha, fake tha ya genuine, that doesn’t matter. Bola toh sahi na. So, cordial networking maintain rakho. Industry mein supportive connections aur professional relationships achi cheez hain.
Social gatherings ka part bano aur apni social muscles build karo. Roz different logon se milo, 4–5 different friend groups banao, influencer Quadsia ke saath outings, rides aur activities ka part bano. Aise dheere dheere open up karogi, comfortable feel karogi aur tumhara social confidence naturally improve hoga. Ghar par gatherings mein aana jaana bhi rakho. Meerub, aapki personality mein social, comfortable aur charming side develop ho sakti hai.
Jab apne circle mein socially comfortable ho jao, phir industry ki social gatherings mein bhi jaaya karo. You learn a lot, and you develop so many other skills. Lekin pehle apna circle build karo. Gym friends banao, pottery classes mein friends banao, different activities mein participate karo. Har jagah apne connections banao, taake kisi ek person, group ya area ko apni universe ka centre na bana lo.
Logon ke saath aisa hona chahiye ke obviously, main apni life aur priorities ko bhi importance dungi, but I can still be supportive, warm, fun and emotionally available. No overgiving, no overattachment, and no unnecessary expectations. Jab aap detachment ke saath relationships maintain karte ho, toh aap doosron se unrealistic expectations nahi rakhte, aur relationships bhi healthy rehte hain.
Overgiving ki aadat se logon ki expectations barh jaati hain. Phir kabhi woh aapki efforts ko value nahi karte, kabhi aapse utni hi availability expect karne lagte hain, aur eventually aap khud resentful feel karne lagte ho. Isliye apni energy, time aur attention thoughtfully invest karo. Give from a place of genuine care, not from the fear of losing people or the need to be valued.
I learned this by observing Humayun Saeed. He prioritizes himself, but he is also supportive, sociable, warm and well-mannered with people. You can prioritize yourself without becoming cold or rude. You can be detached without being indifferent. And you can be kind without overgiving.
Silence is also communication. Har silence ko fill karne ki zaroorat nahi hoti. Har waqt baat karna, entertain karna ya apni presence prove karna zaroori nahi. You can give people comfortable company even when you're not talking. Sometimes, just being present is enough.
Initially, parties aur gatherings mein jao aur comfortably observe karo. You don't have to become the loudest person in the room. Shahveer's wife, for example, seems quite reserved in certain social settings, yet being quiet doesn't automatically mean someone lacks confidence. Sara Ali Khan has also shown different sides of her personality in public settings. The point is not to copy anyone but to understand that you can be quiet, secure, composed and still have a strong presence.
Lekin shuru mein small-talk skills zaroor develop karo. Baaton se baat nikalna seekho, questions poochna, doosron ko genuinely sunna, common interests discover karna aur conversations ko naturally continue karna seekho. These are interpersonal skills, and they improve with practice.
Start small. Apne friends ke saath comfortable ho, phir different social circles mein jao, aur eventually industry gatherings ka part bano. Observe people, learn from them and build genuine connections.
Your goal is not to impress everyone or become everyone's favourite. Your goal is to become socially comfortable, emotionally secure, self-respecting and genuinely warm, so you can enjoy people's company without making their attention the centre of your life.The fact, Fahad Mustafa once said something along the lines of not mixing much with people because he didn't know what to talk about. I don't clearly remember the context, so I might be paraphrasing, but this is exactly what happens when you don't build your conversation skills and social muscle.
Look at Adnan Khan through Tamasha. He interacts a lot with the team and others. Aapki personality mein bhi woh nikhār aata hai jab aap logon ke saath interact karte ho. You may have the most joyful, funny and charming personality, but if you're socially uncomfortable, you won't be able to express it openly. Your charm will remain restricted. People may say you're hilarious, but most people won't know that side of you. That's why fans and people may struggle to connect with you.
The fact is, Aena Khan and Meerab have their own social circles. Apne aas paas aise 5–6 logon ka group banao jinse aap roz interact kar sako. Phir ahista ahista yoga, gym aur different activities ke through naye logon se milo aur baat karo.
Grocery shopping karne jao instead of always shopping online. Aapko pata hota hai ke kya lena hai, kis cheez ki quality kaisi hai, kaise bargain karna hai aur kya questions poochne hain. Is se aap seekhte ho ke kitni baat karni hai, kya poochna hai aur apni needs confidently kaise communicate karni hain. Apni betterment ke liye baat toh karni hi hai. Ghar aakar aap evaluate bhi kar sakte ho ke product ki quality achi thi ya nahi. You learn practical judgment, communication and street-smartness.
Solo travel karo, safe places explore karo aur cafes mein short conversations ki practice karo. English fluency ke liye rozana ek chapter loudly read karo.
Private space mein aap apni expressions, habits aur communication consciously practise kar sakte ho. I have literally practised different smiling expressions privately, even while eating or watching shows. I used to notice a particular giggle or tone that I found cute, adopt it and consciously practise it whenever something funny happened. Agar bhool jaati thi, toh apni recordings check karti thi. Eventually, I became comfortable doing it naturally in public, too.
Jiya Shankar and Jannat Zubair are examples you can observe for expressions and social presentation. The point is to understand how facial expressions, smiling and body language affect communication. Your facial expressions influence how people perceive your confidence and approachability. You can be funny and interactive, but if you consistently look uncomfortable, people may misinterpret your intentions. It's not about people-pleasing; it's about expressing your personality comfortably and authentically.
Grocery shopping, bargaining and talking to strangers help you in several ways. First, your fear of judgment gradually reduces because you realise that communicating is a normal part of life. Second, you develop conviction in your body language and learn to express your needs without hesitation. Third, when you practise laughing, joking and interacting with your friends, you become more comfortable expressing those sides of yourself in different settings.
Initially, it may feel awkward, and that's completely fine. Practise within your comfortable social circle first, then gradually expand it. Solo travel can also give you opportunities to interact with people outside your usual environment, provided you prioritise safety and respect other people's boundaries. You can be a little silly and goofy, too. Everyone eventually goes home, and you learn from the experience. Notice which behaviours feel authentic and charming, and which ones don't suit you. Keep what feels natural and discard what doesn't.
Dance while going for a walk if you feel like it. Enjoy your life instead of making romantic relationships your primary source of excitement and temporary satisfaction. Apni healing karo, discipline build karo, naye skills seekho aur grow karo. If you expect your partner to provide all the happiness, healing and fulfilment you haven't developed within yourself, the relationship can become emotionally draining.
The more contentment you find in your own growth, skills and inner world, the less dependent you become on external validation. You develop standards, confidence and a stronger sense of identity.
No one is inherently the most beautiful or the best at everything. What matters is continuous self-development and personality development: becoming street-smart and book-smart, maintaining a soft feminine exterior with gentle expressions and smiling confidence, and developing a strong mindset and inner world.
Work on healing childhood wounds, self-care, confidence, boundaries, femininity, rational thinking, objectivity, integrity, values, adaptability, learning, interpersonal skills, social skills, conflict resolution, conversation skills, emotional regulation and a calm, regulated nervous system.
Allah should remain the centre of your universe. Allah Ta'ala ki taraf apni healing aur sukoon ke liye rujoo karo. Logon se connection rakho, lekin unhein apne emotional fulfilment ka sole source mat banao. Don't expect people to heal you or meet every emotional need.
Agar aap kisi ke saath achha karte ho, toh Allah ki raza ke liye karo, not because you expect the same energy in return. Agar woh reciprocate nahi karta, toh resent mat karo. Instead, reflect rationally and objectively. Pattern recognition ke baad initiate karo, lekin agar aapka judgment galat bhi ho jaaye, toh apne aap ko lose mat karo. Bas experience samjho, boundaries set karo aur zaroorat par distance maintain karo.
Har kisi ko foran cut off karna zaroori nahi. You can remain cordial, maintain courtesy and even make dua for people without giving them the same access to your life. Don't give people so much power over you that their behaviour determines your peace. Detachment doesn't mean becoming cold; it means caring without losing yourself.
Life ko unnecessarily difficult mat banao. Apni skills develop karo, networking seekho aur different social environments ka part bano. Fahad Mustafa ki personality ko bhi observe karo. If he gradually became more comfortable with social interaction, it illustrates how practice can help build confidence. Social gatherings ka matlab vulgar parties nahi; achi gatherings, community events, meaningful activities aur travelling ke through naye logon se milna bhi hai.
Pehle apni social confidence build karo, phir gradually different gatherings mein participate karo. Keep learning, growing and evolving. Aapki value sirf looks ya kisi relationship se define nahi hoti. It also comes from your character, skills, values, confidence, emotional security and the way you carry yourself.