Go, put Allah first, at the center of your universe, and keep Akhirat in mind. I've seen people who put other things at the center of their universe, and ekdum se jab moh aati hai, wohi cheezen unko idhar-udhar le jaati hain. So, jab Allah center of your universe hoga, you will never compromise your integrity. You will not engage in close-proximity situations because, committed ho ya not committed, your dignity becomes your top priority.

Because of that, and also, Islam mein, jitni der aap namaz padhne mein lagate ho, utni hi aapki kamyabi mein hoti hai. Foran azaan ho, foran namaz. Aur agar namaz padhne ki aadat nahi hai, to build that habit. Din mein ek ya do namaz roz padhni hai. Aise aise aap gradually improve karoge.

Surah Waqiah for rizq, aur phir chhod do. Rizq aapke peeche aata hai. Partner aur rizq, ye do cheezen Allah Ta'ala ne apne haath mein rakhi hain.

Then growth and skills. Apne aap ko har cheez mein improve karo. Expression is a skill, baat karne ka tareeka is a skill. Everything is a skill. What you repeat, you become. And how do you become? What you see becomes your thoughts, so create your environment consciously. Apni feed, apne groups, sab kuch aisa create karo. Jo aap dekhoge, aap waise banne lagoge. Aap khud-b-khud waise banna chahoge. Make a conscious effort ke maine kya dekhna hai. Music, poetry, in sab ko apne groups, Instagram aur YouTube se not interested karo.

Shabash!

And now, go into every setting with the mindset ke maine apna waqt yahan enjoy karna hai. I just want to have fun in a platonic way, with everyone. No desperation energy.

And then come home and socialize. Girls, socialize! Mira Sethi. Though it doesn't matter ke aapko company kitni achhi milti hai, lekin kuch achhe log choose karo. Take two, three, four friends jinke saath you can hang out regularly. Ikra is very non-judgmental about people. So when you feel like, "Oh, this person is awkward and all," no. When we socialize, we need to create the energy. For that, you need to be sociable, with a detached mindset. You're just having fun for the sake of having fun. Enjoy. Appreciate people, support people, and connect with them through that.

And yes, apni boundaries banao. Koi agar aapko kuch keh raha hai, foran witty comebacks do. Sometimes silence is appropriate, lekin sometimes witty comebacks bhi zaroori hain. Aise logon ko aapki khamoshi ki aadat pad jaati hai. Phir jab aap ekdum se bolte ho, to woh aapko badnaam karne lagte hain.

And third, apne secrets kisi ke saath share nahi karo. When you reveal your secrets, you become prisoners to them.

Validate your emotions by crying to Allah. Everything is energy. Hum jis cheez ko energy dete hain, woh humari life mein aur prominent ho jaati hai. Allah ki taraf rujoo karo, dua karo, phir apni emotions release kar do. After releasing those emotions, bas, let them go. If you keep repeating that story, you make it a part of your story, your self-identity and self-concept: "I have trauma. I have loneliness."

Emotions kuch waqt tak last karte hain. After that, the story you tell yourself becomes important. Your neurons become stronger with repetition, emotions and the stories you keep telling yourself.

So, after releasing your emotions, if you're crying, cry. Release those emotions in front of Allah. Dua karo, kyun ke dua mein qubooliyat ke khaas auqaat hote hain. And make sure ke aap kya maang rahe ho.

Then rationally and objectively understand that emotion. Search karo ke ye emotion mujhe kyun feel ho raha hai. Gain knowledge about it. After that, rationally, objectively, strategically and calculatively, with integrity, make a decision, and with discipline, stick to it.

Your emotions are raw. They are indicators and sensors. You shouldn't automatically act on your emotions. They are just raw ingredients. Allah gave us a brain, rationality, objectivity, logical skills, decision-making skills, strategic thinking, planning, execution and wittiness. Comebacks are skills, too. Aap in cheezon ko polish karoge, tabhi to aapko samajh aayega na?

Femininity is a soft exterior, a soft voice, elegance, calmness, a regulated nervous system, joyfulness and theharav. And never have that desperate, chasing energy.

Internally, a woman makes decisions based on rationality, logic and what's best for her.

Women have their cycles, right? Unke gham aur stress ki wajah se unki khoobsurti affect hoti hai, unke hormones disturb ho sakte hain. And when your hormones are disturbed, dil mein Allah ka zikr aur sukoon hona chahiye. Your inner peace is sacred; protect it at all costs.

Agar aap depression mein chale gaye, to ibadat karna bhi mushkil ho sakta hai. Yaani phir aap Akhirat se bhi door ho jaoge aur duniya se bhi. And Hazrat Ali se mansoob ek quote hai: "Nothing in this world deserves a single drop of your tear."

So, rationally make a decision. Islam is all about balance, and life is all about balance. Make a decision while considering everything: gham, stress, pregnancy, menopause, periods, children. Sab kuch manage karna hota hai.

Shaadi is a responsibility. It's not just ke aapko ek banda mil gaya. If you're doing it just for that, it means you don't have a life of your own and you don't socialize much.

Aur maine to apni zindagi bana li hai, bhai. Baghair ye sab cheezen establish kiye, main shaadi nahi karungi. Not without the right partner. And no matter how good a partner someone may be, if they are not choosing me, they cannot be the right partner for me.

So there is time.

I used to be a daydreamer. I used to be overemotional. I developed all these skills. I literally made Allah the center of my life.